I always heard that being a Bitsy was supposed to be "ez-pz", piece of cake, nothing to it, simple as pie ~ correct? The Lil Momma and Precious are supposed to have to handle all the tough stuff - manners, teaching a sense of right and wrong, stinky diapers, formula, etc., hence delegating to Bitsy not a single thing to do but have fun with the Webbman. Right? Wrong.
Reading all the Grandma books, reviewing all the information I've heard over the years . . . that is pretty much how this "Bitsy" thing is supposed work, right? Let me elaborate! That's not exactly how it shakes out, at least not for this Bitsy. Seems I have always worried and continue to do so for hours, days, months, and years upon end as the Lil Momma's "Momma" and what can I say except, the worry hasn't let up. Not one teenie tiny bit. How many synonyms are there for the word "worry" ? After checking, it seems that there are a good 30 some odd, and I've done them all.
| Main Entry: | worry |
| Part of Speech: | noun |
| Definition: | anxiety, trouble |
| Synonyms: | anguish, annoyance, apprehension, bad news, care, concern, disquiet, distress, disturbance, doubt, fear, headache, heartache*, irritation, misery, misgiving, nag*, pain*, perplexity, pest, plague, presentiment, problem, torment, torture, trial, uncertainty, uneasiness, vexation, woe, worriment |
I have moved on to worrying about the little man. I resorted to writing down my top "presentiments" (check it out-it's a synonym for worry), and I will share them with you for your reading pleasure or commiseration (depending on your point of view). Try to compose yourselves because these are vexations (How do you like that one?) that haunt me when I lay my head down on the pillow at night. Here we go, listed below:
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~Webb will love his other grandma (Honey) more than me. What the hell difference would this make? Don't feel especially bad Honey - it's a curse. I want the little man to adore you. I just want him to adore his Bitsy too, well maybe just a "little" MORE :)
Something bad will happen to Webb.
Webbman will think I am the next best thing next to Baby Einstein and bananas and will want to run away and live with me.
Something bad will happen to the Lil Momma and Precious.
Webb will think his Bitsy is a "wierdo".
Webb will think his Bitsy is "boring".
Webb will think his Bitsy is "ugly" and wonder what happened to her "hair".
That I will be a long-distance "Bitsy", a Bitsy without the open door for my loved ones to drop in unexpectedly for dinner, to be there for the Webbman's sporting events or school programs, or to even be the backup plan when the Webbman is feeling yucko and Mom and Dad can’t wriggle out of work.
Webb will be worn down by the complexities and harshness of life.
That's it, that's all of them for now.
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We all know the Webbman is only four months old, so as he gets older, I'm sure I'll be able to solidify my worries and fears to a more tangible real sense of anguish in no time. They'll become more real and undoubtedly more scary. Hang in there with me. I'm sure I'll need some words of wisdom and help.
As I write tonight about my fears, I'm listening to some Motown favorites~enough about my worries and concerns because I know Webbman will have no question as to my taste in music. Otis Redding, The Four Tops and Bitsy go way back. This is for you guys and yes, for you, my little Webbman, enjoy!
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